Just another day in March...

New Years brings resolutions, and this year was no different for me. In the past, I had the typical resolutions of diet and exercise- which always fail spectacularly, usually within an embarrassing few weeks. One year I made the resolution to be more intentional in my life, and honestly, I came out of that year changed and more aware. Resolutions aren't all bad. This year, having been through some legit craziness in past 11 months, I planned to journal. Not in the religious "I must stick to this or I fail at life and just quit" like dieting or exercising often tends to go, but in the "if I make it work today, great; if not, then there's tomorrow" mentality. Actually, the diet and exercise might succeed if I could keep the journaling mentality...
    Any way, I started out ok.
Then more than life happened.

Crisis struck.
Emergency function mode began and continued for about 6 weeks.
    Journal... What journal? Oh yeah. Well, I didn't even eat or shower for the last few days, so journaling-- that's just not going to happen.

But life is finally starting to settle back out. Crisis mode is transitioning to a new normal, one that is beyond busy and difficult to proce
ss in its own ways. So maybe its time to start journaling again. And maybe find some connection as well. That has been one of the hardest parts of being unable to work, missing out on the friendships and relationships with colleagues, patients, and families. I derived personal satisfaction and value from these interactions, and missing them can feel invalidating. Actually much of the chronic illness life can feel invalidating, but I think I'll speak more to that another time.

If you are reading this... thanks. Thanks for connecting.
<3